My youngest daughter has a much higher tolerance for clutter than I do. As a mother I want to teach her good habits, and when I see the bathroom is strewn again with all the accoutrements that a teenage girl needs to get ready for the day it gets rather frustrating.
Often I think “why is she such a slow learner?!” and then I patiently, without irritation, nicely (well, mostly nicely) ask her to clean up her things.
Then it strikes me: How slow of a learner am I? About a year ago I wrote an article about trusting the sovereignty of God in a pandemic.
I wrote about how I had to learn that I wasn’t in control, that God is and always will be in control, and that I am still a sinful woman who continually struggles to live by faith in Him.
And where am I a year later? Where are we all? The pandemic is still raging—if not worse than it was a year ago. I just lost a dear grandmother to complications from COVID, and so many I’ve known have been exposed to or are fighting it to varying degrees themselves.
What were the lessons in that article I wrote last year? God is sovereign over all. His plan will prevail. How could have I forgotten that already? Why am I still struggling with contentment in my circumstance and to have faith that He will work out my personal challenges and relationship difficulties?
Yeah, I guess I’m a slow learner, too.
But, wow! I have a patient God. Because even when I feel myself despairing; when I cry out to God in my grief and loss; when I pour out my anger and frustration with injustices in my life or the consequences of sin in the lives of others that leave innocent ones victims…then He is there. He is patiently listening and whispering to my spirit, “Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10).
He is my Covenant-Keeping God who will never forsake me as His child, no matter how slow I am to learn.
So…maybe the next time I see my daughter’s belongings scattered all over the bathroom floor I will remind myself of that and maybe I’ll soften my admonishment a bit to clean up the mess. Or, better yet, maybe I won’t say anything at all.
She might notice all on her own, and then I can thank her for it and enjoy peace and love in our relationship. Maybe that’s what God loves about being patient with me—the waiting makes the fellowship all the sweeter and more real.
Lord, let me not neglect to seek You; let me not be so slow to learn but to long for You and trust You regardless of my circumstances.
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